"This is one of the stories about how they used to hunt these animals, which is just amazing. They’re these huge, giant animals compared to these tiny little guys, you know. You were taking life into your hands if you wanted to kill these animals. So all these stories developed around it. Here in America we have Pecos Bill, a cowboy who could lasso tornados, and Paul Bunyan… larger than life, extravagant, exaggerated characters.
This guy was a legendary whaler, he could catch anything that swam in the sea, but there was this one whale that he couldn’t kill—its name was Crookjaw. He could never kill it, and he’d see it often on his travels, and the whale would always get away. Finally he’s out there in the ocean, sees the whale, "Oh there’s that motherfucker man,"he’s like, "I’m gonna kill it," and he’s getting all buffed up. "Take me up along side. I’m gonna dive in, take out my knife, I’m gonna wait till it opens its mouth and I’m gonna cut its fucking heart out." So he dives into the water with his knife between his teeth, and he’s waiting for the whale to open his mouth. Finally the whale opens its mouth and he swims in.
He's standing there in the dark. "Where is the fucker’s heart?" He looks in the back, and he sees the devil and a mermaid playing cards. "What the fuck." They’re not paying attention to him, they’re just playing cards, and finally the devil slams down his cards and disappears in blue smoke and sparks, and the mermaid finally looks at him. "What were you playing for?" She smiles at him and says, "You." So he ends up having a one-night stand in the whale with this sexy mermaid. And then the morning he swims out, and the boys are still waiting for him, and they’re like "What the fuck man."
Ray Martìn Abeyta
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